[Internal-cg] Two Edits to the Executive Summary as Suggested Earlier

[Russ Mundy]

Personally, my preference would be to stay with the current text in X016 since I think the info in the last sentence is important to those that will only read the exec summary.  I think the shortening of X017 suggested by Daniel is good.

RussM

On Oct 22, 2015, at 1:14 PM, Daniel Karrenberg <daniel.karrenberg at ripe.net> wrote:

> Here are two edits to the executive summary I suggested earlier. They
> are reflected in "IANA-transition-proposal-v5-karrenberg-mundy-alc" as
> comments. I suggest to strike these words from the executive summary and
> to keep them in the proposal proper. These only intent is to remove
> detail for clarity and readability. If any of you think this detail is
> needed let us keep it and move on.
> 
> Daniel
> 
> ----
> 
> "X016	Coordination across the operational communities is clearly an
> essential component of the Internet's successful development to date and
> collaboration is an integral part of the communities’ operational and
> policy development processes. In the specific case of the IANA
> functions, each community has clearly confirmed to the ICG its ongoing
> commitment to cooperation.   That commitment to cooperate has led to the
> situation we have today, where registries from the three communities are
> administered by the IANA Functions Operator (at ICANN) even though the
> operational and policy decisions for where these registries will be
> located, and how they will be run, are decentralized."
> 
> I propose to delete the final sentence so that the paragraph reads:
> 
> "X016 Coordination across the operational communities is clearly an
> essential component of the Internet's successful development to date and
> collaboration is an integral part of the communities’ operational and
> policy development processes. In the specific case of the IANA
> functions, each community has clearly confirmed to the ICG its ongoing
> commitment to cooperation. "
> 
> ---
> 
> "X017	The three proposals together include appropriate and properly
> supported independent accountability mechanisms for running the IANA
> functions, relying mostly on the right of each operational community to
> select a new entity for the performance of the IANA functions."
> 
> I propose to delete the part after the comma so that the paragraph reads:
> 
> "X017 The three proposals together include appropriate and properly
> supported independent accountability mechanisms for running the IANA
> functions."
> 
> ---
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
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