[Internal-cg] Implementation email for ICANN

[Manal Ismail]

Many thanks Alissa ..
Looks good to me as well, along with the proposed edits ..

If we're adopting those edits, I suggest reflecting them consistently throughout the email, of course depending on how formal this email is supposed to be and whether you're sending on behalf of the ICG or ICG chairs .. In other words, if we're replacing 'we' with 'the ICG' and 'Larry' with ' Mr. Strickling, it may be appropriate to do so in some other occurrences as well (suggested edits below in blue) ..

I also believe that the sentence reading 'The ICG has inquired with the operational communities' gives the feeling that we have already received their responses .. So I think 'is inquiring', or something along the continuous tense, may be more accurate ..

I'll leave to yourself and other native speakers to decide and happy to proceed with the current draft as is if agreed to be more appropriate ..

Kind Regards
--Manal

From: Internal-cg [mailto:internal-cg-bounces at ianacg.org] On Behalf Of joseph alhadeff
Sent: Thursday, May 28, 2015 1:24 PM
To: internal-cg at ianacg.org
Subject: Re: [Internal-cg] Implementation email for ICANN

A couple of minor points related to this version:

I think the use of "Larry" in the last paragraph is too informal use the full name or Mr. Strikling.  Also in the last sentence, why should we limit soliciting their thoughts only till June? - why not in the course of the proposal development process?...

Other than that fine.

Joe
On 5/28/2015 2:21 AM, WUKnoben wrote:
Thanks Alissa,

see my suggestion in red.

Best regards

Wolf-Ulrich

From: Alissa Cooper<mailto:alissa at cooperw.in>
Sent: Thursday, May 28, 2015 12:58 AM
To: internal-cg at ianacg.org<mailto:internal-cg at ianacg.org>
Subject: [Internal-cg] Implementation email for ICANN

Here is a proposed email to ICANN/Steve Crocker based on our discussion during call #17. Please provide your feedback.

---

Dear Steve,

The ICG chairs recently received a letter from Larry Mr. Strickling [1] that included the following text:

"Accordingly, to assist us in our planning for the fall, I ask that the community provide us with an update on the status of the transition planning and the associated timeframes, including the community's views as to how long it will take to finalize the transition plan and implement it after it is approved. We request that you and the three primary customer working groups provide us with your views before the end of June, which will give you the opportunity to discuss these issues with the multistakeholder community at the June ICANN meeting in Argentina. In providing this feedback, please keep in mind that the United States Government will need sufficient time to evaluate the proposal and that all work items identified either by the ICG and the CCWG-Accountability as prerequisites for the transition will need to be implemented prior to the ending of the contract."

We understand that the CCWG chairs received a similar letter.

We The ICG hasve inquired is currently inquiring with the operational communities about how much time the communities believe they will need to complete their proposal development and implement the aspects of the transition proposal that the communities have identified as needing to be completed prior to the expiry of the NTIA contract (e.g., creation of new contracts, agreements, or entities) [2][3][4]. We The ICG expects ICANN to provide input within those communities as appropriate as they formulate their responses to us, but if there are time frames associated with internal ICANN processes or any other ICANN-specific implementation information that you the ICANN board thinks we should know in formulating our the ICG response to Larry Mr. Strickling, we would appreciate if you could share that with us directly by June 9 at 23:59 UTC. If you have further thoughts to communicate to us later in June, that would be welcome as well.

Thanks,
Alissa, Patrik, and Mohamed

[1] http://www.ianacg.org/icg-files/correspondence/Letter-to-ICG-May-6.pdf
[2] http://www.ietf.org/mail-archive/web/ianaplan/current/msg01847.html
[3] https://www.nro.net/pipermail/ianaxfer/2015-May/000563.html
[4] http://mm.icann.org/pipermail/cwg-stewardship/2015-May/003402.html
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