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Colleagues:<br>
<br>
I attach a proposed executive summary. I have drafted a slightly
longer stand alone version of the summary sourced from the
document. It summarizes process and conclusions. We may wish to add
a closing section as it seems to end abruptly?<br>
<br>
Happy for any thoughts.<br>
<br>
Jennifer, I'm running out to a meeting, could you post the draft
executive summary to drop box?<br>
<br>
I also attach a first and incomplete draft of what had been a more
summarized version, but think that the short version may be best
suited to public material or a cover note. I attach it to see if
any language could be useful elsewhere...<br>
<br>
Joe<br>
<br>
<div class="moz-cite-prefix">On 7/23/2015 11:55 PM, Jennifer Chung
wrote:<br>
</div>
<blockquote cite="mid:01d001d0c5c4$8b1119c0$a1334d40$@icgsec.asia"
type="cite">
<pre wrap="">Hi All,
Attached and linked is v5-MI-LSA-PW-JC. Dropbox link:
<a class="moz-txt-link-freetext" href="http://icgsec.asia/1JiezqA">http://icgsec.asia/1JiezqA</a> . This includes Paul's latest edits as well as
the requests from Manal below:
"maybe secretariat could kindly assist in inserting the suggested
link(s)/footnote(s) (criteria against which the ICG assessed the proposals,
individually and collectively) and graph (showing the % of IANA transactions
(for 2014) per area) .."
Two points relating to Manal/Lynn's request:
1. I have linked to the published ICG proposal finalization process
<a class="moz-txt-link-freetext" href="https://www.icann.org/en/system/files/files/iana-transition-assembly-finaliz">https://www.icann.org/en/system/files/files/iana-transition-assembly-finaliz</a>
ation-24dec14-en.pdf. We have not published the individual assessment word
template (<a class="moz-txt-link-freetext" href="http://icgsec.asia/1el3lEA">http://icgsec.asia/1el3lEA</a>) on the ICG web site - I can do so if
we want to link to this in the ICG report.
2. The data for the chart inserted was taken from pg. 53 of the IANA
presentation linked here:
<a class="moz-txt-link-freetext" href="https://singapore52.icann.org/en/schedule/wed-iana/presentation-iana-departm">https://singapore52.icann.org/en/schedule/wed-iana/presentation-iana-departm</a>
ent-11feb15-en.pdf. Lynn/Manal/all, please let me know if this is that is
envisaged.
Lastly please note that the paragraph numbering is not correct in this file.
Once all the edits for the ICG report are in, the Secretariat will merge the
ICG report back into the correctly numbered v5.
As always, the latest versions of all the public comment related documents
for your review is in this Dropbox folder: <a class="moz-txt-link-freetext" href="http://icgsec.asia/1OfxHW2">http://icgsec.asia/1OfxHW2</a>
Please let me know if you have any questions.
Best Regards,
Jennifer
-----Original Message-----
From: Internal-cg [<a class="moz-txt-link-freetext" href="mailto:internal-cg-bounces@ianacg.org">mailto:internal-cg-bounces@ianacg.org</a>] On Behalf Of Manal
Ismail
Sent: Thursday, July 23, 2015 9:07 PM
To: Lynn St.Amour <a class="moz-txt-link-rfc2396E" href="mailto:lynn@lstamour.org"><lynn@lstamour.org></a>; <a class="moz-txt-link-abbreviated" href="mailto:internal-cg@ianacg.org">internal-cg@ianacg.org</a>
Subject: Re: [Internal-cg] Latest version of the combined proposal - v5
Many thanks Lynn for the suggested edits and for your comments ..
Following your email, I would also urge colleagues to review and provide
feedback by Friday in order to meet our public comment period dates ..
Meanwhile, for the sake of time, maybe the secretariat could kindly assist
in inserting the suggested link(s)/footnote(s) (criteria against which the
ICG assessed the proposals, individually and collectively) and graph
(showing the % of IANA transactions (for 2014) per area) ..
I also believe we need to conclude on the order of the proposals .. Although
it is not a substantial change it would still require a thorough review and
several edits throughout the document (ICG report, sections' headers, ...)
..
I had a few questions throughout the report and hope colleagues would review
and provide further guidance ..
Finally, some parts of the text (highlighted in blue to my best) reflect the
current status of the accountability proposal (ongoing discussions) which
won't be the case (accountability proposal finalized and put out for public
comments too) by the time the combined transition proposal is out for public
comment .. Should such parts be changed to reflect the status of the
accountability proposal at the time of the public comment period?
Looking forward to receiving your input/feedback/suggestions/comments ..
Kind Regards
--Manal
-----Original Message-----
From: Internal-cg [<a class="moz-txt-link-freetext" href="mailto:internal-cg-bounces@ianacg.org">mailto:internal-cg-bounces@ianacg.org</a>] On Behalf Of Lynn
St.Amour
Sent: Thursday, July 23, 2015 6:54 PM
To: <a class="moz-txt-link-abbreviated" href="mailto:internal-cg@ianacg.org">internal-cg@ianacg.org</a>
Subject: Re: [Internal-cg] Latest version of the combined proposal - v5
Again, thanks much Manal,
To-date, I reviewed this through the ICG report section (only), and made
some edits to try and convey why the report was combined in this way. I
would appreciate it if folks could review it carefully, as I believe it is a
critical point (and sensitive). And, some of it may be better suited to the
Exec. Summary.
Joe, I believe you had volunteered to send some draft text re the Exec.
summary. If this is correct, can I do anything to help? If I have it
wrong, I will look up the minutes (can't do that just now though,
unfortunately).
And, could those individuals who have been participating in the CWG -
Stewardship and the CCWG efforts, please review the appropriate sections to
ensure they reflect the latest positions?
Finally, we should aim to have all comments on this and the public web-site
no later than this Friday, so that we can review the "very near final"
drafts of this on Monday, in order to meet our public comment period
timetable of July 31st.
Many thanks,
Lynn
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